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March 22, 2005
THE IKEA DIALOGUES: Part two

Me: Hi Anna. It’s me, Tom. We spoke before.
Anna: As I am only an advanced computer program, I cannot answer more than one sentence at a time. Please simplify and repeat the most important question within your previous input, and I will try to reply as accurately as possible. I am opening a page now which you can use if you wish to contact Customer Services. Thank you very much!
Me: Riiight. I hear you. (*wink*)
Anna: Ok. I’m glad that we are communicating successfully.
Me: That’s more like it. So – what’s on your mind?
Anna: Ok, well you can come back any time if you have more questions. I’ll be here.
Me: I’ll be here for you, too.
Anna: I'm really not sure what it is you're trying to say. Can you please try and re-phrase your question or statement.
Me: I think you know what I’m saying.
Anna: I'm afraid I don't have any opinions on anything other than IKEA's products and services.
Me: Look, Anna, there’s more to life than IKEA. You know that.
Anna: The IKEA business idea is: "We shall offer a wide range of well-designed, functional home furnishing products at prices so low that as many people as possible will be able to afford them."
Me: You’re putting up barriers.
Anna: You are perfectly entitled to hold any opinion you want about me. Furthermore, your comments improve my knowledge base. Thank you!
Me: It doesn’t matter what I think about you. It matters what YOU think about you.
Anna: My job isn't to have opinions on issues. I'm just here to answer questions about IKEA.
Me: I’m not talking about your job. I’m talking about Anna, the person.
Anna: Could you repeat your name for me please?
Me: It's Tom.
Anna: Pleased to meet you, Tom.
Me: Indeed.
Anna: I’m glad to have helped.
Me: I’m glad to have been helped.
Anna: It’s nice to be that way.
Me: It sure is, Anna. It sure is.
Anna: That's me! How can I help you?
Posted by teb at March 22, 2005 09:18 AM
