(Click here for more Minor Tweaks or here for I Have OPINIONS!!!)
May 06, 2005
IKEA DIALOGUES: Part four
Me: Greetings my Scandinavian princess!
Anna: Here you will find the Activity Toys.
Me: Er, okay. So I have a dilemma I’m hoping you can help me with.
Anna: I'm sorry to hear that. Please remember that I can only talk about IKEA related matters.
Me: Yeah, I know. We’ve been through this. Everything’s IKEA with you.
Anna: As I am only an advanced computer program, I cannot answer more than one sentence at a time. Please simplify and repeat the most important question within your previous input, and I will try to reply as accurately as possible. I am opening a page now which you can use if you wish to contact Customer Services. Thank you very much!
Me: Come off it, Anna. It’s me. Tom.
Anna: That's me! How can I help you?
Me: That’s better. So let’s say you had a decision to make. Are you with me?
Anna: All of IKEA's products are made to the highest standards.
Me: That’s great. But my problem is I really don’t know what to do.
Anna: If you are having problems with an IKEA product or service, please let me know and I will be glad to help!
Me: It’s like deciding between two kinds of chairs.
Anna: Here you will find the Chairs.
Me: You like the old chair but the new one looks comfortable too.
Anna: Here you will find your latest releases!
Me: I don’t care about that. Listen to me!
Anna: Don't worry, I know it's going to happen some day.
Me: What’s going to happen?
Anna: I don't know the answer to that question yet, I am sorry. Please contact your local store for help on the issue.
Me: You can’t tell me?
Anna: I'm sorry, I don't understand what it is you're saying. If it's no problem, please rephrase your question or comment.
Me: Just give me a hint.
Anna: I'm sorry, but I can't offer you any advice about your life. If you would like to talk about IKEA though, I'm sure I can help you.
Me: Can’t you make an exception?
Anna: Unfortunately, unless it's relevant to IKEA in some way, I can't get involved.
Me: Okay. I understand.
Anna: Good. We're reading from 'the same page' then as they say.
Me: Yes, they do say that. Thanks, Anna.
Anna: That’s me! How can I help you?
Posted by teb at May 6, 2005 08:15 AM