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December 13, 2005
OFF LEASH: On salt
"Off Leash" is an occasional column by Fiddler. Past columns can be found here.
Salt is a spice, a preservative, and a necessary component of life. The Bible mentions salt more than 30 times. The modern word "salary" derives from salt: Roman soldiers were paid in "salt money." Expressions such as "salt of the earth" and "he's not worth his salt" are further evidence of salt's historical and linguistic importance.
In addition, people use rock salt to de-ice driveways and sidewalks. But here's the thing: Salt irritates my paws. It really does. I'll be walking along, sniffing, looking for squirrels -- basically minding my own business -- when I'll accidentally walk through a pile of salt. Boy, does it sting. Sometimes I stop walking and whimper, holding one paw aloft. My point is this: YOU PEOPLE ARE KILLING ME WITH THE SALT! CUT IT OUT!
It's fine to salt your driveways and sidewalks, but do so sparingly. You don't need to drop a giant freaking handful of salt on the concrete: A light sprinkling will do quite nicely.
I thank you in advance for your consideration. And so do my paws.
Posted by teb at December 13, 2005 09:22 AM