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December 06, 2006
How to open the Vicks ear thermometer
1. Attempt unsuccessfully to open hard, plastic package with hands.
2. Attempt unsuccessfully to open hard, plastic package with scissors.
3. Curse vigorously and repeatedly.
4. Grab knife from drawer. Stab package several times.
5. There. That's better.
6. Now that the package is open, attempt unsuccessfully to free thermometer from the plastic ties that bind it to the interior plastic molding.
7. Curse the manufacturer of the thermometer, the designer of the package, the inventor of plastic, and all of humankind.
8. Use scissors to snip plastic ties and then wriggle thermometer free from interior plastic molding. Curse once more for good measure.
9. Hear Kellie ask from other room: "Everything okay in there?"
10. Respond: "Yes. Everything is fine."
Posted by teb at December 6, 2006 12:27 PM